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View Article  A Little More "Nuditity" Please

Archie Bunker, the protagonist of the massively popular 1970s TV sitcom “All in the Family” used to decry the increasing amounts of “nuditity” in the world that always seemed out of synch with his less than open-minded views.
 
I kept thinking about this classic malapropism as Jody and I attended a performance of the Pilobolus dance troupe where there was more than enough “nuditity” on parade to shock even Meathead, Archie’s liberal hipster son-in-law.
 
“Not that there’s anything wrong with that,” as Jerry Seinfeld would say some twenty years later in an equally popular sitcom.
 
We of course knew that a Piloblus performance was not for the modesty-inclined. The troupe, founded in 1971 at Dartmouth College, has long emphasized the pleasures of the dancing flesh.
 
But the advertisements in the Friday print edition of the Jerusalem Post showed the dancers in rainbow-colored skintight leotards, as did Pilobolus website’s home page. Jody had seen the group perform nearly twenty years ago at Hebrew University and was keen to relive what had been an inspirational evening. I figured there’d probably be some adaptation of the show’s dress code to cater to local mores.
 
So when the curtain opened at the Jerusalem Theater a few weeks ago and the four men and two women comprising the troupe appeared not in leotards, but clad only in loin cloths and (for the women) bikini tops, I was a little surprised.
 
But hey, I’m a modern guy, I can deal with a little "nuditity," right? I was more worried about some of the other members of the audience. In particular, a religious-garbed couple in the row in front of us – he with a large knitted kippa, she in a tasteful wig – as well as our fourteen-year-old son Amir’s religious school principal who was sitting with his wife two rows in back.
 
In addition to the skimpy wardrobe, a Pilobolus show is defiantly erotic. The dancers contort themselves into pretzelated shapes that defy our conventions of what the human body is capable of. The repeated pairing of flesh upon flesh without the mediation of substantial amounts of fabric can’t avoid but conveying overt sexuality, even in one dance, for example, that clearly seemed to me to depict two insects in battle.
 
Set to rhythmic drums and world music from the likes of Brian Eno and The Talking Heads, the dancers of Pilobolus are at once exuberant and graceful; it is a feast for the eyes. After awhile, awareness of clothing (or lack thereof) faded away; it seemed natural. Like, why would dancers ever want to be encumbered by something as bulky as a leotard in the first place?
 
After a short intermission, we settled back into our seats to enjoy the second act. But what was that...was she? Were they…oh my
 
The women had dispensed with their bikinis and now were completely topless. I squirmed a bit uncomfortably in my seat, feeling that somehow my feelings must be representative of the wig wearer in the front row and Amir’s principal behind me.
 
Oh yes, did I mention we were seated in the second row?
 
Then I heard nervous giggles. I looked around. There were children in the audience. Who brings their pre-teens to an R-rated dance performance?
 
Which got me wondering: was this appropriate? Was the nudity really necessary…in Jerusalem in particular? Would the Pilobolus performance create unnecessary friction, I wondered? Would word get out and lead to black-clad boycotts outside the theater the following night? Maybe the Chief Rabbis would go so far as to shut down the second performance?
 
And: would it have been so hard to leave those bikini tops on for just a few more minutes?
 
Yet, despite the nudity being so decidedly in your face, so to speak, no one got up to leave. People seemed to be truly enjoying themselves. When the final number launched – an Esther Williams-esque slip and sliding acrobatic skinny dip on a wonderfully water-flooded stage – the audience was on its feet cheering and clapping. Las Vegas had arrived in the Holy City and Elvis had not left the building.
 
And it occurred to me that rather than worrying that Pilobolus might prove incendiary, I should be applauding the fact that Jerusalem can support events like this and that people come out in large numbers to attend (the shows were completely sold out).
 
For Jerusalem, despite its reputation for moving increasingly towards ultra-orthodoxy, is still quite the cross-cultural and post-denominational melting pot. Maybe more so than ever. And that's a good thing. For Jerusalem...and for the entire Jewish people.
 
And so I joined in the fun, swaying to the music as the dancers splished and splashed their way through several curtain calls. Because underneath our clothes, we’re all the same, right? What could be a better rallying point for Jewish unity!

Hey Arch, bring me some more of that there "nuditity."
View Article  Bat Mitzvah Treasure Hunt

Merav’s bat mitzvah had been going great…we’d finished the first round of dancing and the guests had loaded up their plates with homemade ravioli and teriyaki salmon. The bat mitzvah girl was beaming from all the attention and we were generally feeling like everything was under control and proceeding according to our carefully crafted plan.
 
Indeed, after all the months of organization leading up to the big day, keeping the evening flowing was critical. There were speeches to give and songs to sing, not to mention my world-famous PowerPoint presentation to project.
 
Then my brother Dave stood up, took the microphone, and made an announcement to the assembled crowd.
 
“On your tables you will find several strips of paper,” he said with a glimmer in his eye. “These are clues. They are part of a puzzle for you to solve for Merav’s bat mitzvah.”
 
Murmurs immediately began gurgling forth.
 
“But let me give you a hint,” Dave continued. “You don’t have all the pieces of the puzzle. You’re going to have to work together to solve it.”
 
He promptly sat down…and total pandemonium broke loose.
 
None of this was new to Dave. He does this all the time for a living. His business Dr. Clue runs team building activities focused on treasure hunts and puzzles for corporations all over the world. But this was his first bat mitzvah and none of us quite knew what to expect.
 
Within seconds, the room had exploded into a frenzy, with guests no longer sitting nicely at their tables chatting about the stuffed mushroom hors d’oeurves or the latest political pleasantries.

No, about half the guests were running from table to table, swapping strips of paper, while other members of each “team” were working out the riddles, scribbling frantically on napkins.
 
Dave genially floated between the tables, offering help when needed and generally marveling at what the influence of 35 twelve-year-old girls can have on one of his Dr. Clue activities.
 
I sat back, took in the scene with no small amount of whimsy, and helped myself to some more ravioli.
 
The clues were all rebuses - word puzzles that involve the adding together of pictures and subtracting letters to create a final message.
 
Now for those of you who’d like to play along with the "home version" of this game, here are the clues (the answer’s a little bit further down on the page - now, no peeking!):
 
#1   + D +
 
#2   – J – N +  – BA
 
#3     +
 
#4     +
 
#5  +  H +
 
#6     – S +
 
#7   – A +  – W – A +
 
#8   FU +  – NEAT
 
#9   +
 
#10 - RE - + E + - GAN +
 
#11     +  – A +  – MANIC
 
#12  +   – CR +  – M – H +
 
#13   – C
 
#14  +  +
 
#15     + Z +
 
#16  - L + H
 
Did you get it?

It took about twenty minutes before the table #6 erupted in applause and excitement. “We got it! We got it!” they cheered.
 
“Now go do it!” my brother yelled back.
 
They looked dumbfounded for a moment before realizing that getting the answer first didn’t mean they'd actually won anything but rather they had another activity in front of them. Dave had conveniently provided each table with paper and crayons.
 
The answer to the puzzle, in case you haven’t gotten it yet...

Wait for it...

I said, no peeking...

OK...here it is:
 
#1 - FIND
#2 - A PART
#3 - NER
#4 - OR
#5 - TWO AND
#6 - WORK
#7 - TOGETHER
#8 - TO GIVE
#9 - MERAV
#10 - A POEM OR
#11 - PICTURE
#12 - ABOUT
#13 - HER
#14 - BAT
#15 - MITZ
#16 - VAH
 
Table #6 got busy, as did Table #8 and Table # 12, and before long, the poems and pictures started flowing.
 
After a few minutes, I took to the microphone myself and began inviting up those tables who had something they wanted to share. I heard rhymes for “Merav” I never dreamed of before. Such as:
 
There once was a young girl called Merav
Whose family showered her with love
Her Torah reading was hearty
So they threw her a party
Where the dancing and entertainment was so suave
 
There was also…
 
Merav reads books and has such good looks
She lains from the Torah and dances the Hora
She watches National Geographic and she’s so fantastic!
 
(If you'd like to send your own poem to Merav, you can leave it in the Comments section at the end of this blog post or send me an email.)

Afterwards, a number of people came up to us and said they’d never been to a bat mitzvah party quite like this. I had to agree. We’d never been to one like this either!
 
Indeed, if there was any downside it was that everyone was so busy, they didn't have time to go back and get seconds on the food. At the end of the evening, the caterers presented us with nine large containers of leftovers.
 
Looks like we'll now be doing a treasure hunt through our fridge for homemade ravioli and salmon.
 
----------------------------------------
 
I want to give a big thanks and shout out to my brother: bat mitzvahs may be new but Dr. Clue is the world leader in treasure hunt-based corporate team-building activities. They've even put a couple of new hunts together for Jerusalem and Tel Aviv. If this sounds like something your organization would enjoy as a fun and productive day out, contact Dave Blum directly at drclue@drclue.com. And tell him you heard about it here from This Normal Life!
View Article  Parking Problems

When family comes to town, I tend to find myself  in the car, driving, more than usual: to and from various restaurants for meals, off for tiyulim, shopping downtown. That was certainly the case in the last two weeks as twelve-year-old Merav celebrated her bat mitzvah.

Now, with family safely back in North America and life here settling back to normal, I had a little time to think about my time behind the wheel, and in particular the changing relationship between Israel and automobiles. The conclusion, as anyone who has tried navigating this little country of ours will agree, is inescapable:

Israel just wasn’t made for cars.

Which was OK until fairly recently because there weren’t a lot of cars around in the first place.

When I first visited Israel in the mid-1980s as a student, riding in a car, at least one that wasn’t a taxi, was a big deal.

“You have a car? Could you give me a ride?"

‘Where are you going?”

“Doesn’t matter. I’ll just sit for a few minutes, if that’s OK?”

Coming from car-crazy California, Israel of 20 years ago was like joining a 12-step program for auto-aholics.

Times have changed and today, everyone has a car. And very often two. And that’s where our latest problems start.

There just isn’t room on the highways to drive all those cars, hence traffic jams that only get worse each year. Most of our main freeways were built with only two lanes in each direction, maybe three if the planners were particularly forward thinking. Half of the numerous public works projects going on all over the country, it seems, are for adding lanes to existing highways.

Of course, it won’t be long before those aren’t enough.

But what does it matter if the roads are improved if there isn’t room in the neighborhoods and offices to park them all?

Even new cities like Modi’in that were planned when cars were already the rage only allocated 1.2 parking spaces per apartment. Don’t ask me what the planners were thinking. Of course, as a commuter town with no industry of its own to speak of, everyone has two cars.

So where do they put them? The answer is clear to anyone trying to take a leisurely stroll: on the sidewalk.

Doesn’t matter where you are in the country, the sidewalks are just a second row of parking. I don’t mean that people park perpendicularly, sticking the car nose onto the pedestrian walkway. Rather they do a full parallel park on the sidewalk proper. I actually think people prefer to park on the sidewalk. After all, it’s the closest you can get to your destination. To walk even a meter further would make one a freier, a sucker.

Still, it’s an infuriating practice, especially when you’re walking with your kids, maybe a stroller, and you have to veer into the street every few meters just to pass.

Sure, there’s a law against it. But what policeman has time to enforce parking procedures when there are terrorists to stop.

Part of the problem is the way that people get their cars in Israel. I read somewhere once that more than 50% of the country’s rolling stock is actually a benefit given to employees from their companies. Work compensation, at least in hi-tech, routinely consists of a salary, a cellphone, health benefits…and a car.

You can tell which cars belong to which companies because they sport the company’s logo in a large sticker plastered on both sides near the rear of the car.

Companies that give their employees a car as a benefit pick up both the insurance and the gas. The system is so ingrained that Israeli service stations have a special gas pump that connects wirelessly to a chip in the car and automatically calculates the price without ever requiring a shekel or credit card to change hands.

Everyone knows that carpools and public transit could significantly alleviate the problem. But in an age when buses are known to blow up, many people I know who used to catch Egged to work now drive or take taxis.

To wit: Jerusalem has recently been adding exclusive busways to some of its busier streets as the first stage in a broader plan to build a light rail in the city. The thing is, I never seen any buses in the busways. The only thing for sure is that the line of traffic jammed up in what little's left for private cars suggests that "Field of Dreams" adage "if you build it they will come" may not apply to public transit in our nation's capital.

Still in your car? Parking at the office poses no less of a creative challenge than back home. Many companies have solved this by hiring a full-time employee whose sole job is to double park cars in the corporate lot. I’ve even seen double stackers which lift one car up into the air so another can park underneath.

Don’t get me wrong. I'm happy to kvetch, but this certainly isn’t a reason to leave the country. And things are slowly getting better.

The public parking lot in Tel Aviv’s Azrieli Shopping Center is as spacious as any in North America, with color-coding throughout, pay-before-you-leave machines, ample lighting, and escalators that really work, whisking you into the center itself.  The parking lot at Ben Gurion Airport's new Terminal 3 (pictured above) is a similar joy.

Indeed, to find a well-designed parking lot can be so exciting, it’s sometimes worth the trip alone. Forget the mall upstairs, I came to park.

That is, if you don’t mind the traffic getting there…and the fact that when you get back home you’ll probably have to park on the sidewalk again.
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